Today's the day
365 days have passed. Exactly one year ago, i officially stepped into the real working world. Yes, it was 1st of June 2005 when i was appointed as a programmer. I was only 21 and barely 22. Back then, i knew exactly what it was like to be featured in the rat race. I knew what the world was like out there. But then again, i tried to deny. Why? Simply because i have to live in that world one day whether i like it or not. I pushed the negative thoughts aside and brought the positive ones in. It was sort of like a motivation to myself, to keep myself moving on. Somehow when i was floating in the middle of the big ocean, i found myself lost. I couldn't see any shore. I didn't know where i was heading as there weren't any signs to show. I felt that i've completely lost my aim and my goal. Before i graduated, getting a degree was what actually motivated me to stand up everytime i fall. After i have my scroll with me, what's next? I mean, i didn't want to drive a big car, i did't want to own a big house, i was happy with my pay, plus i wasn't crazy for power and status. Seriously, it was a dead end. I was completely clueless. I did what i have to do and took on my responsibility. Unfortunately, in this cruel society, people expect MORE. They want you to do things that cannot be done by a person alone yet they are going to pay you peanuts for it. So, tell me. Why would i stay when i get everything the same plus i have my own extra personal freetime to at least bring my mind back to a normal state?
Working sometimes can really drive a person insane. Don't tell me office job is easy just because you sit there the whole day and la di da. Try it and you'll wish this is not part of the life process. Well, unless you are smart enough to eliminate the invisible pressure. But i can tell you, it'll be ongoing.
There were tonnes of reasons why i left the company. In fact, for the first time, i went against my parents to make my own decision. I knew they were unhappy. To them, job trotter will end up nowhere. But hey, that's what happening today to all the fresh graduates. You need to find something you like to do only you can last longer, right? You can't just simply take a lime as a substitute just because you can't have the lemon. Just that they both taste almost the same, it doesn't mean they are the same.
The culture, the people and the language. They didn't suit me.
Culture - Very conservative (old fashion? hehe). Few weeks back, one of my close buddies said that i have the orang putih attitude after i've told her what's going on with my current life. Guai mui, she called me. But i can tell you, i'm not the extreme type yet not on the too conservative side either. I'm just at the right dose which is in the middle.
People - Bad. Trust no one in your company. I can go on for this topic until the doom's day but no, i'm not going to do that. Experience it yourself ;) Anyway, i count myself lucky because everywhere i go, i manage to set up a "circle trust" (HJ & SL's idea). This circle only allows people whom i feel comfortable to open up with to come in. In fact, i have a few circles which created according to the chapter of my life and i'm really glad that i met those people :) I can't stand fake people and i hate being betrayed especially friendship. "If you can't beat them, join them instead!" - screw that sentence. I'm not going to the dark side.
Language - Limited. I know you feel much more comfortable speaking your mother tongue to the people who share the same race but then think again. Don't you want to improve the language you are weak in? Sadly, some people would rather stay in their own shell. During my schooling years, i used to speak at least 3 languages per day. I've even taken my chance to improve my Mandarin which was enrolling in a majority-consists-of-Chinese college. Kekekeke. Today, i can proudly say, after 4 years of polishing, i improve from a 5% to a very good whooping 85% of speaking Mandarin. Scold me and i will not hesitate to scold you back in that language. But damn it, I have no idea why i still do not understand those Taiwanese shows. I can't seem to catch what they are saying. They speak Bahasa Cina baku, is it? Or because of their accent? I really have no idea and that's why i don't watch 'em. I've gained throughout those years but I pity those who can't seem to perfect their Cantonese or English. Why? Because whenever they open up their mouth, it's Mandarin. They never really put their effort in to learn, plus they do not seem to be interested. No driving force. I can see many are suffering when they enter the working world. Boss speaks English. Colleagues speak Cantonese. You speak Mandarin. In the end, you end up mulut basi because you can't communicate. Reason: Language barrier. You know what? It's not a good thing to thrash my own race or any other races. But for those who know that you are doing something not right, why not correct the mistake today? English is always the universal language. Pick up that copy of newspaper today and start reading.
I remember when i was standing strong on this point of view of mine regarding the language issue, a friend actually said, "What if China dominates the world one day?" I was like "heh?". This friend of mine, he, himself is actually a "banana" like me but i so wanted to stuff 10 bananas into his mouth that time. So? Even if China is going to dominate the world one day, it's not goin to happen in a day or two, right? Let's say 20 years or maybe i give them 10 years to be successful on the mission, i still have nothing to lose. I can still speak both the languages. And most of all, you do not want to look back and regret that once being looked down by a salesgirl who realised you didn't know how to speak decent English just because you didn't cherish the chance you had to learn.
I think i better stop before i write a 10-page long of crap. Met up with a few people earlier today that i've met one year ago. ;) If today you ask me to be a programmer again, i'll seriously tell you to program my ass so that every fart will smell as nice as DKNY Be Delicious or perhaps Body Shop Kistna ;D
*awwwhh, i feel my BM so karat after the previous post.
.: That building lorrr :.
.: Server menyampah. Khong pi saja larh. MSSQL is not stable but still so stubborn wanna use it. Sheesshhh :.
.: Good feng shui. Eh-he :.
Working sometimes can really drive a person insane. Don't tell me office job is easy just because you sit there the whole day and la di da. Try it and you'll wish this is not part of the life process. Well, unless you are smart enough to eliminate the invisible pressure. But i can tell you, it'll be ongoing.
There were tonnes of reasons why i left the company. In fact, for the first time, i went against my parents to make my own decision. I knew they were unhappy. To them, job trotter will end up nowhere. But hey, that's what happening today to all the fresh graduates. You need to find something you like to do only you can last longer, right? You can't just simply take a lime as a substitute just because you can't have the lemon. Just that they both taste almost the same, it doesn't mean they are the same.
The culture, the people and the language. They didn't suit me.
Culture - Very conservative (old fashion? hehe). Few weeks back, one of my close buddies said that i have the orang putih attitude after i've told her what's going on with my current life. Guai mui, she called me. But i can tell you, i'm not the extreme type yet not on the too conservative side either. I'm just at the right dose which is in the middle.
People - Bad. Trust no one in your company. I can go on for this topic until the doom's day but no, i'm not going to do that. Experience it yourself ;) Anyway, i count myself lucky because everywhere i go, i manage to set up a "circle trust" (HJ & SL's idea). This circle only allows people whom i feel comfortable to open up with to come in. In fact, i have a few circles which created according to the chapter of my life and i'm really glad that i met those people :) I can't stand fake people and i hate being betrayed especially friendship. "If you can't beat them, join them instead!" - screw that sentence. I'm not going to the dark side.
Language - Limited. I know you feel much more comfortable speaking your mother tongue to the people who share the same race but then think again. Don't you want to improve the language you are weak in? Sadly, some people would rather stay in their own shell. During my schooling years, i used to speak at least 3 languages per day. I've even taken my chance to improve my Mandarin which was enrolling in a majority-consists-of-Chinese college. Kekekeke. Today, i can proudly say, after 4 years of polishing, i improve from a 5% to a very good whooping 85% of speaking Mandarin. Scold me and i will not hesitate to scold you back in that language. But damn it, I have no idea why i still do not understand those Taiwanese shows. I can't seem to catch what they are saying. They speak Bahasa Cina baku, is it? Or because of their accent? I really have no idea and that's why i don't watch 'em. I've gained throughout those years but I pity those who can't seem to perfect their Cantonese or English. Why? Because whenever they open up their mouth, it's Mandarin. They never really put their effort in to learn, plus they do not seem to be interested. No driving force. I can see many are suffering when they enter the working world. Boss speaks English. Colleagues speak Cantonese. You speak Mandarin. In the end, you end up mulut basi because you can't communicate. Reason: Language barrier. You know what? It's not a good thing to thrash my own race or any other races. But for those who know that you are doing something not right, why not correct the mistake today? English is always the universal language. Pick up that copy of newspaper today and start reading.
I remember when i was standing strong on this point of view of mine regarding the language issue, a friend actually said, "What if China dominates the world one day?" I was like "heh?". This friend of mine, he, himself is actually a "banana" like me but i so wanted to stuff 10 bananas into his mouth that time. So? Even if China is going to dominate the world one day, it's not goin to happen in a day or two, right? Let's say 20 years or maybe i give them 10 years to be successful on the mission, i still have nothing to lose. I can still speak both the languages. And most of all, you do not want to look back and regret that once being looked down by a salesgirl who realised you didn't know how to speak decent English just because you didn't cherish the chance you had to learn.
I think i better stop before i write a 10-page long of crap. Met up with a few people earlier today that i've met one year ago. ;) If today you ask me to be a programmer again, i'll seriously tell you to program my ass so that every fart will smell as nice as DKNY Be Delicious or perhaps Body Shop Kistna ;D
*awwwhh, i feel my BM so karat after the previous post.
.: That building lorrr :.
.: Server menyampah. Khong pi saja larh. MSSQL is not stable but still so stubborn wanna use it. Sheesshhh :.
.: Good feng shui. Eh-he :.
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